100 Word Review - #T26 - Dear Esther

As a book, it probably would've been pretty decent.

Dear Esther

Genre - Adventure, Indie, Casual

Metascore - 77%

Developer - thechineseroom, Robert Briscoe

Other Games by Developer - N/A

Tom's Playtime -  1.3 hours

I'm receptive to the idea of games as art, however Dear Esther seems to forget about the idea of games as games. The modus operandi here is simply on-foot navigation around an island while the protagonist narrates to you. Very little happens in Dear Esther and it was tedious to reach completion, but along the way I found merits in the eloquent writing style and a few environments which would give Skyrim competition. These merits do not detract from the non-existent “gameplay” that Dear Esther attempts to provide and, while better than Dinner Date, it too is ultimately forgettable.

Tom's Score - 3/10

100 Word Review - #E5 - BIT.TRIP RUNNER

Please abduct me now!

BIT.TRIP RUNNER

Genre - Action, Indie

Metascore - N/A

Developer - Gaijin Games

Other Games by Developer - BIT.TRIP BEAT

Edgar's Playtime - 2 hours

...and I've played 2 hours of this before smashing my keyboard against the wall. This a nice retro-styled auto-runner game where a superb chiptune music is built by adding extra instruments when you pick up special trinkets splattered along the level, while jumping, dodging and trying not to get trampled by all the obstacles. If you "die", you'll return to the BEGINNING of the level again... and again.... and again.... because "checkpoint" is an unknown word in this world and, unfortunately, the initial enthusiasm with the game quickly turns into rage and frustration after a couple of levels. What a shame.

Edgar's Score - 3/10

100 Word Review - #M3 - Star Wars: Dark Forces

It's like a hidden-object game all over again.

Star Wars: Dark Forces

Genre - Action

Metascore - N/A

Developer - LucasArts

Other Games by Developer - Star Wars Jedi Knight: Dark Forces II, The Secret of Monkey Island: Special Edition

Mat's Playtime - 6.6 hours

The nostalgia, the whimsy, the Nintendo-hard difficulty – we all love retro gaming, but probably only console platformers. Dark Forces hasn’t aged well at all. Essentially a key-hunt, the gameplay depends on you exploring every level completely, but the textures are so repetitive you often can’t see corners along walls. It’s like running through a tedious optical illusion. Supposedly the first FPS to let you look up/down, it’s clumsily implemented through pageup/down. Luckily the glass-like enemies fall as soon as you look at them so you have plenty of time to dance the robot. Pushing boundaries then, but just painful now.

Mat's Score - 3/10

100 Word Review - #37 - Dead Horde

Please just make it stop

Dead Horde

Genre - Indie, Action

Metascore - 45%

Developer - DnS Development

Other Games by Developer - Booster Trooper, Twin Sector

My Playtime - 1.9 hours

I should start taking metascores more seriously. What we have here is a poorly executed attempt to cash in on the huge success of the zombie genre. The only redeeming feature of this game is the amount it makes you laugh, because it’s so laughably poor. The best example of this is the incidental music that lets you know when you’re about to get attacked. Or not - it can just trigger and then turn itself off with nothing happening. There are tons of movement glitches, the difficulty is all over the place and it’s just not worth your time.

My Score - 3/10

100 Word Review - #21 - Critical Mass

This game has a colour-blind mode. Just for Tom.

Critical Mass

Genre - Indie, Casual

Metascore - 81%

Developer - Manic Game Studios

Other Games by Developer - N/A

My Current Playtime - 0.6 hours

I generally like to play at least a couple of hours of a game before reviewing it, but I just can't with this one. It is so incredibly boring, that I can only last about 5 minutes without having to stop. The game requires you to create groups of 4 coloured blocks by placing them on a 3D structure. I found having to move around the structure really quite annoying, but maybe I’m just too used to 2D block/puzzle games like ‘Tetris’. There are a few game modes, the best being ‘‘Meditation’’ where you have to start building from scratch.

My Score - 3/10

100 Word Review - #2 - Puzzle Agent

Many of the puzzles are just slight alterations of earlier ones

Puzzle Agent

Genre - Adventure, Casual

Metascore – 70%

Developer – Telltale Games

Other Games by Developer – Sam and Max, Back to the Future: The Game


My Current Playtime – 2.7 hours            

Anyone who’s played a Telltale game before should know what to expect – constant pointing and clicking. This is pretty much a knock off of the ‘Professor Layton’ games on the DS, and doesn’t come anywhere close to the quality of it. I completed it in less than 3 hours, in which there were only 37 puzzles. The puzzles are easy and repetitive and the art style is distracting. The story redeems slightly and the voice acting reminds me of the excellent ‘Fargo’. If you want a good puzzle game, get your hands on a DS emulator and ‘Professor Layton’ ROM.

My Score – 3/10